My name is Graham Couzens and I have severe Social Phobia / Social Anxiety
Disorder. I decided to TRY Get Over It
or at least share my experiences attempting it. I
will share my daily activities and struggles with Social Anxiety Disorder.
March 20, 2006-Social Phobia
Health: Taking a Break
I
alluded to health problems and depression previously. I have recurring health
symptoms that point to some sort of major illness, possibly diabetes. Perhaps
something much worse. I have not been updating this site as much as I would
like. I have come to the conclusion that I will only update 2-3 times per month.
I had hoped for at least weekly or daily updates.
I have been spending way too much time
online for several years now. It is a "Catch 22" since everything I do that is
productive is generally an internet transaction. Being online wears me down
physically and mentally but is necessary for my continued existence. The
internet is literally a life saver for someone with social anxiety disorder. A
few days back I decided to take a break from the computer.
I did manage to mostly stay off the
computer from Thursday afternoon until Sunday morning. I was forced to because
of a swollen left hand, presumably from typing. Being sedentary is not healthy
either. Fortunately my weight is about the same as 3-4 years ago. My health is
not. I would like get back to my best physical shape and overall health of
around 1998-1999. During that time I was trying to go to classes and played a
lot basketball and weight-trained in public settings. I am mostly isolated now
and that is impossible. I am hoping it will snow a lot and I can run around my
back yard in the snow hauling things-Rocky 4 Siberia-style. Right now I am
running laps and climbing stairs in the basement. When I can feel my legs, that
is.
I decided when I started this site that
I would be completely honest about myself, but that I would leave my family,
friends, and acquaintances out of it. There are too many people on the internet
who share WAY too much information about their personal lives. That said, I have
to admit a huge part of my social anxiety and health problems are related to my
private life and relationships with/to others. At this time I have many people
around me who have caused me a great deal of physical, emotional, and financial
stress. I have chosen to carry this burden for the time being with the best of
intentions. However, "Something's Gotta Give." My social anxiety has been a
debilitating disorder. I have done all I can to still be alive, let alone feed
myself. It is hard for me to have a lot of empathy for people who do not do all
they can to deal with and live with their choices. I will never allow anyone to
kill what little life there is left in me. Every day I have severe pains,
thirst, depression, and other ailments too numerous to list.
My social phobia fixes:
In order to just keep living, it is necessary to take a Break- from work, from
people, from the internet. TRY to get exercise and eat well... And try not
to have the whole world on your shoulders. Social Phobia and Social Anxiety
Disorder are stressful enough as it is. One has to be extra careful with health
decisions.
Recent Entries: 3/20/2006-
3/2/2006-
Social Phobia Fatigue- Social Anxiety
is Depressing
1/29/2006
Get a Haircut and Oil Change
with Social Anxiety
Social Anxiety Archives
(Previous Posts)
About My Social Phobia / Social Anxiety
Disorder
Social Phobia
Help Books Overcoming Social Anxiety Disorder
